July 25, 2005

Last thoughts for Monday...

I told you today really sucked right.. WELL, IT ONLY GOT BETTER!! LMAO..
Recently, I've been thinking of buying a kitty... could be because I'm so fucking lonely that any type of companionship will do. So anyway, I've been looking around @ pet stores and they want $75 just to adopt a cat.. Yea right.. So I went on Craig's List where u can find anything under the sun... I saw a few ad's.. and I talked to one lady.. Lisa. She said she had some persian kitties that were 11 wks old.. Ok.. $50 buck...(for anyone that DOESN'T KNOW, Persian Cats are on the expensive side so this was a steal of a deal..lol) I get directions and after work I head on over. When I arrive at the house the first thing I hear is barking when I approach the door. The lady open's the door and invite's me in. She was a round, short woman with pale blonde hair... it's cut short ..very short.. I assumed she was a lesbian (although I could just be stereo-typing)I walk in and I swear to god this must be a fucking petting zoo!! Not only did the 25 dogs almost knock me on my feet.. the smell was excruciating!!! There were dogs everywhere!! Big ones, little ones.. white ones, black ones.. muts..pure breds.. u name it they had it.. then the cats were all over the couch.. on the floor, in the kitchen.. I had to get out of there immediately. I made up some excuse to leave FAST! When I got out I felt like I couldn't breathe.. the smell was all in my clothes.. my hair... It was plain Gross.. I may rethink the Cat idea..


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OTHER BREAKING NEWS!!


I'm on my way home and I'm having this great conversation with Aaron.
No arguing... No fighting... No sarcastic comments.. We're laughing and just
talking. We get on the subject of babies. I say how I'm really wanting to have
one now. At first I was a little unsure because I didn't want to gain too much
weight, but now I'm getting that feeling again. Then he tells me that he is not
having kids anytime soon... and I fucked up because when I had the fertility meds
I went around saying how I didn't want any children ( which I did) and now I want to act all brand new. I was really hurt by this. Of course I understood where he was coming from. We're in 2 different states, we have no real commitment.. but then again we were just talking. He continues to reiterate what I already KNOW. HE's moved on and I'm just holding on for dear life until he cuts the cord permenantly.
I KNOW there's someone else. Come on!! He used to email me good morning all the time. Now all he wants to talk about is sex.. I'm good for that, but when it comes to real conversation he shys away and turns it into an arguement. Fuck it. No one understands my pain.