This Sucks...

I just had an entire post that was lost.. I hate that.. because I have absolutely no drive to re-write it... To make a long story short My son started the 5th grade today.I'm amazed at how fast time flew by. And I guess a list will have to replace my poetically versed entry that was erased....

Aaron left last nite @ 8pm
I cried until midnite
didn't sleep much
i wonder why
shouldnt I be grateful for the time we spent
it truly was a wonderful weekend
i did some nasty things ya'll
guess
umm hmm u still trying to guess
something i vowed never to do
and no it wasnt anal
i would still NEVER do that!
but I went there ya'll ....lol
still thinking on it
my son started 5th grade
he is much too smart for his good
he knows me well
sometimes i worry too much
i'm working on that
it's not easy not to worry when there is so much tragedy around us
i really miss aaron
his toothbrush looked so confortable in my bathroom
i think we will be ok
i cant say we will get back together
but at least we know where we're headed
who shot shug knight?
when is teej coming back
i hope he took some pics
i cant wait for winter
damn summer went by fast
does it seem that the older you get
the faster
and faster
time seems to fly
speaking of flying I may overcome my fear soon
maybe not
but sleeping pills always work
i made a promise to myself
im going to work hard on getting my poetry published
im getting better ya'll
really i am
no more cutting
damn i LOVE that man.
Work sucked today
by the way
i may move back to cali
yea yea i know.
HE is in cali
but he is where I want to be
forever.
he thinks i don't enjoy life
he says i'm forcing the issue
maybe I am
but isn't love worth fighting for.
he wrote a beautiful poem for me
he kissed me
he hugged me
i don't think he wanted to leave me
i KNOW he loves me
sometimes I'm just too insecure.
oh yea I got the hair off
I cut myself twice!
OUCH!
and OUCH!
lol
It didn't bleed much
do my lists suck?
I could make them more interesting
i'm seriously thinking of going back to school
life is much too short to waste it on nothing
I'm very talented.
I'm slowly coming into my beauty.
I used to feel less of a woman because I wasn't SKINNY
I like myself now
I'm working on loving myself
I can't wait to see him again
this weekend we will go camping...
Hmmmmm.....Sounds like trouble
At times I can be jealous and nosey
Why?





The loves of my life.. Aaron/MarQuin


The first day of school...






MY happiness...




i'm gonna pay for eating this frozen burrito & macoroni/cheese...((sigh))