Today was NOT a good day, but I tried to make the best of it. Not only did I cry twice today, but I think I'm getting a cold or something because my throat is sore. This weather is all messed up. It's raining.. it's humid.. it's windy,it's hot...Mother Nature needs to make up her mind as do I! LOL I know I keep reiterating how difficult this break up is.. and I've been analyzing my own self destruction. I'm trying.. I SWEAR I'M TRYIN. I WANT TO GET HIM OUT!! It's like he's crawling in my soul & flowing thru my blood. I've never loved like this and I've only lost like this once in my life. I asked him if he wanted me to go away... I was so hurt today. I pretended like I was strong. I wished him away & resorted to my typical reactions when I'm not getting my way. He didn't respond.. with each day passing.. it's becoming more evident that I've lost him. It will only be when I admit it to myself that I will essentially move on with my life and grow out of his shadow. I was introduced to very nice man. 30yrs old, down south native, employed, ect...I went out with him on Friday. In my mind I never gave him a chance. When he sent a salutation this morning... I was quick to dismiss it.. then I thought twice, so I agreed to see him later on after work. I'm glad I did. He's a gentlemen and I appreciate his concern and understanding of my feelings..
Goodnite All.
P.S. The answers... HE knows who I'm referring to...
1. I'm losing weight and as the weight comes off so does the insecurities..
2. My son is and always will be my #1 priority. HE is my life
3.I'm still learning to enjoy life.. I'm still learning to enjoy me.
4. Still working on that too
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1 comment:
I just happend to find your blog. You remind me of me...well the things you say, like love and hate being one in the same. i wish i could tell you that things would get better, but i think i'm more at the begining of the journey that you are on rather than near the end and am there for in no position to give my thoughts...Just a question, how did you know? like if you still love someone then how can you know that its over? adn do you beleive that people can change? night---
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