Simple Minded, simply put; Women vs Girls

Current mood: indifferent
Category: Life


In my lifetime I've seen many places, met many people.. good, bad and indifferent it's affected the person I am today. I'm fortunate in a way that I am capable of recognizing my mistakes and turning them into positive outcomes. It's why I am who I am today. Something that truly bothers me to this day is the way black women fight against one another. Now, please understand this is in no way a blog attacking men, but let's face it, men aren't the MOST honest creatures God created. How many of us have fallen in love with Mr. Right now... Ya'll know who I'm talking about.. Charming, Handsome, seemingly successful, great in bed, smooth talker? Yea, him! He's probably your man right now. In the begining, everything is great. You feel almost euphoric at his slightest touch... then one night while laying in bed next to him, his phone rings. You glance down and see a text message that reads: Hey baby, last night was amazing. I miss you daddy, when are you cumming home? Love, Keisha... Your heart is crushed. What should you do? Confront him? Ignore it? Then you remember you worked late the night before and he didn't answer when you called. The emotions rush from hurt to rage in a matter of minutes and right there at 2 am you're in your first fight with Mr. Right now. *Sigh* But he was different...



I know this story all too well because I lived it for 5 years. I loved a man who was incapable of loving me. He made me feel as if everything were my fault. Woman after woman, he cheated, using the internet as his vessel to lure in unsuspecting EASY women... even I, myself, met him on a popular web-site. I was reluctant to meet him and didn't for almost 3 months. I'd never dated anyone from the internet before, but HE was beautiful and SMART. A year into our relationship I found the emails and the im's.. the porn, the text messages. I was devastated... forced into a dark realm of second guessing the woman I was.. my self esteem diminished and I felt I needed him... I began concocting my own stories to keep him near. I couldn't lose him to one of these internet floosies... what was wrong with me? Our fights became more and more violent. He'd become physical, almost killing me once. I still held on... when I look back now, I see a lost, unhappy woman... I moved back to California.. still holding on. I took fertility meds to have his babies only to lose them due to more infidelities. I was going insane. On the verge of a nervous breakdown, I finally left. What had I done so wrong. I was the bad guy.. to his family and stupid in the eyes of my own.

A month away from HIM I became lonely. I found myself wanting him back. We tried for awhile, but the same issues would always occur. I was still victimizing myself. When I began dating again I almost felt guilty. Every now and then we'd come together for sex.. that was it. Then something happened to me... I'd started to become empowered by this great strength.. I'd joined the gym and lost some weight. I felt good and looked better than ever! People noticed.. I was happy. ... I still needed closure. I sought it and was rejected. I felt empty. I FEEL empty.



I'd found out he was seeing one his chicks he'd cheated with in the past. It hurt and I lashed out! I was wrong, I know now, but it was purely emotion based. It wasn't about her, but now it's become about her. She believes what he tells her not knowing or fully understanding the depth of his character. Understanding that this is NOT my place to make a believer out of her... I still feel the need to defend my own character. I can't understand WHY women feel the need to fight against one another? What makes her so much different from me? Nothing. A man that is abusive will ALWAYS be abusive.. a cheater is ALWAYS a cheater and a LIAR is always a liar. Attacking my character or making comments that are unsubstantiated makes you look more childish than I ever could. Why would he reveal the truth to you? I honestly feel one day as black women we NEED to come together and support each other. We have daughters to raise ... the lack of self respect, self esteem has lowered our value greatly in this society. I know there are good black men out there. I know SEVERAL ( and I love ya'll) but when we come across the few that don't respect us as women and play vicious games with our hearts.. let's not fight each other.. How Simple minded is that? Are we women or girls?



Simply put.. Reese







Six degrees of separation refers to the idea that, if a person is one "step" away from each person he or she knows and two "steps" away from each person who is known by one of the people he or she knows, then everyone is no more than six "steps" away from each person on Earth. Several studies, such as Milgram's small world experiment, have been conducted to empirically measure this connectedness. While the exact number of links between people differs depending on the population measured, it is generally found to be relatively small. Hence, six degrees of separation is somewhat synonymous with the idea of the "small world" phenomenon. Detractors argue that Milgram's experiment did not demonstrate such a link,[1] and the "six degrees" claim has been decried as an "academic urban myth".[2]